40 Days & 40 Nights (Updated)

I AM GIVING UP SEX FOR LENT

*Pause for applause*

After talking to my best friend about lent. (She's giving up the love of her life: Mary Jane)
She asked what I was giving up for lent, I laughed, said "The same thing I gave up last year... nothing."
We shared a laugh, continued our conversation about everything else, eventually said Goodnight and hung up.

Fast forward a few hours, I'm obsessively watching the facebook page of "Big" after seeing him befriend yet another idiot stick figure with no soul who he's sleeping with, texting him that "we cant be friends anymore", because my feelings are hurt knowing I spent all of Saturday evening being overly affectionate with him & all of Sunday morning having sex with him in some random Harlem hotel. I spent the remainder of the evening responding, via text, to sexual advances & random flirtation from men whom I've either already had a sexual encounter or was well aware of their desire to have sex with me. 

I woke up this morning & in very dramatic fashion sent my best friend a text proclaiming:

"Sex. I'm giving up sex for lent. It just came to me, like a lightbulb went off in my head. I've been complaining about sex, being unfulfilled, feeling used & more. It makes perfect sense."

Her response: "Wow"

She knows me well, she knows that me giving up sex is pretty damn close to Christ being in the desert with no water.

Guy Code: Decoded

I need male perspective for a post I'm working on for Bitchy & Beautiful.
If you are a single, dating, engaged or married man interested in answering between 7-10 questions about your experiences in love & dating... email 20somethingsocialgirls@gmail.com :)
Thanks in advance!

(Note: All participants will be kept confidential)

Whats Your Number? Pt. I

So you're lying in bed with your significant other after months of bliss & (s)he asks... "How many people have you slept with?"

What do you say?
How do you answer?
The real question is... Do you share such an intimate detail of your life?

Well... in case you dont know me, I am all about honesty! But we'll get back to that ;)

According to folklore you have to multiply the number a woman tells you by 4.

But... what if she's honest with you? What if she's been with more men than you've been with women?

When women sleep with a lot of men, they're called sluts! When men sleep with a lot of men, they're called "experienced", "romantic" & "good kissers". Why the double standard?

Men want their woman to be their whore, mother, wife, friend, teacher & everything else!...
How can she cook you a good meal if she's never been in the kitchen?...

Subscribe & follow my "What's Your Number?" series to find out how to answer the scariest question your partner could ask.

Bedside Manner: How To Have A One Night Stand

A friend of mine said she was going to have a one night stand but she wanted to do it just to say she did it. Now, I'm all for sexual liberation but when you're doing something sexually for the wrong reasons, there isn't quite as much gratification as when you do it because it turns you on. Either way, here is how to have a one night stand & walk away with your dignity intact.

DISCLAIMER: IT IS MY PERSONAL OPINION THAT NO WOMAN UNDER THE AGE OF 23 SHOULD HAVE A ONE NIGHT STAND. ALL WOMEN SHOULD USE PROTECTION DURING ALL SEXUAL ENCOUNTERS.

1. DO NOT choose to have a one night stand with someone you have any kind of relationship with (i.e. ex boyfriend, friend of a friend, co-worker, etc).
Why?: Because the thrill of a one night stand lies in the fact that you'll (potentially) never see this person again... sleeping with an ex opens old wounds and a co-worker makes for some very awkward Monday morning meetings. Go somewhere that isn't in your usual list of places to hang out, chat with, pick up a hottie and make your way to your location.

2. DO NOT bring him to your house. Either go to a hotel or go to his place.
Why?: If you're not the girl who is comfortable kicking a guy out after sex, letting him come to your place is just asking for a sleepover which can get really weird, really fast. If you go to his place or a hotel, it'll blow his mind when you're all done and all gone.

3. DO NOT exchange phone numbers, BBM's, email addresses, etc!!!
Why?: You had casual, meaningless sex... What the hell is there to talk or text about? The only reason to keep open the lines of communication is to build on what was already established and the only relationship (majority of the time) that will blossom out of  a one night stand is an FWB (friends with benefits).